Mixed Feelings After Miscarriage – Parenthood

Dealing with feelings after a miscarriage is not easy. Bereavement, helplessness, stress and loss of self-esteem  are part of this bad patch that women who experience this unfortunate event have to endure.

The loss of a fetus can be as hard as the loss of a child. In our culture, there is no ritual associated with this type of mourning. This is why it is difficult to deal with the emotional reaction. We are facing a subject that seems taboo.

These unpleasant situations often turn into trauma for the women who experience them. Relatives often do not know what approach to take to help people who are going through such an episode.

Miscarriage: A Unique Life That Was Lost

To suffer from a miscarriage is to lose  a unique and incomparable being that we cannot recover. This is the great truth of the people who are going through this difficult episode.

Indeed, when relatives and friends advise affected women, there is often a positive discourse that does not always correspond to the feelings of the woman who has suffered this trauma. Unfortunately, it’s not just about  rebuilding a baby.

Truth be told, having a life being born in our womb marks a unique relationship between mother and unborn baby. Around this new life, we  trace unique places and expectations. Pregnancy is not just a biological or medical process.

Post-traumatic stress after miscarriage

Post-traumatic stress after miscarriage is a concept that brings together the  psychological scars that the loss of a baby leaves. Psychologists claim that it is one of the most complex mental processes that a human being can go through.

Today, there are two types of symptoms produced by post-traumatic stress:  psychological and somatic. These correspond to the bodily manifestations of loss or depression: vomiting, weight loss, abdominal pain, headache, among others.

As for the psychological symptoms, the effects are much more complex . The sensations range from feelings of guilt to hostility. One can also experience sadness, stress, insomnia, lack of motivation, self-destructive manifestations and low libido.

Complexity of feelings after miscarriage

The emotional problem associated with miscarriages  lies in part in the various stages  that the individual experiences during his suffering. These can come in different forms and in no particular order. It can start with the feeling of guilt and then go through various sensations.

It should be remembered that feelings after a miscarriage  do not get complicated only for the mother. The father is also affected. He is going through his own period of mourning. This will cause serious complications for him on an emotional level, in particular difficulties at the level of the couple.

We can also add the social component that surrounds this whole issue. The loss of a baby affects every aspect of the lives of those who experience it. Most people don’t know how to help them. Any comments can cause a bad reaction from those affected.

Complications specific to post-traumatic stress

• Not being able to define what it feels like. The feelings after a miscarriage are changeable. This is why it is difficult to evoke them.
• See the fetus after the miscarriage. Affected parents do not know whether or not it is better to watch the baby after it dies.
• Talk about the subject. The couple will have to decide whether or not they want to talk about their loss. The two will not always agree on the subject and on the form to be used.
• Lack of understanding of parents’ pain. There are comforting phrases from friends and relatives that deny the feelings of parents. For example: “You are young and you can have another baby”.

Parents must go through their grief completely. This will allow them to relieve themselves and reflect. It is for this reason that loved ones should be careful of what they say and respect the bereavement.

Psychotherapy is more than indicated. The practitioner can help them manage their emotions and understand what is happening to them. Couples must create channels to experience their suffering and support each other at all times. Communication will be fundamental.