Why Do Some Friends Move Away During Pregnancy? – Being Parents

Some friends move away during pregnancy. Yet, we used to say that true friends are there for life.

It is assumed that true friendship is unconditional and everlasting. In a way, friends are like a family we choose and feel good with. However, there are relationships that can deteriorate due to motherhood.

During pregnancy, you may feel more lonely than usual. Sometimes it’s a matter of emotion, or maybe a sensation, but other times it’s a fact.

It is even more intense when we are used to an active social life. If we went out with friends every weekend, the change in routine might be more noticeable.

While we intend to stick with most of our habits, there are details that prevent us from doing so. For example, the discomforts of the first weeks take up almost all of our energy.

However, what is sometimes erased is the solidarity of certain friends. Many of our loved ones move away during pregnancy. That being said, it is best not to worry too much as it happens more often than rarely in this situation.

Friends who move away during pregnancy: real friendships  ?

Knowing that we’ve probably all done it, it’s worth thinking about this situation.

Let’s think about all the times we stop visiting a friend who is pregnant. We can not get into the habit of showing our solidarity during this period, perhaps because we think that our friend does not need us.

This is understandable taking a distance in many ways. Why would we seek these friendships? For parties? Rides ? To have a drink? Most of these activities are usually not possible during pregnancy. Alcohol is prohibited, excessive agitation is also prohibited, and lack of comfort is not advised. Everything changes when we go through this stage.

Yet can we say that a friendship ends because of this event? No, for sure. While the bond has not grown stronger, that is not the end of it. In some cases it may instead allow you to discover a better connection with a few friends. However, after pregnancy, motherhood largely limits our lifestyles.

Maintaining a friendship with someone who is childless is difficult. Generally speaking,  true friends are those who have already experienced motherhood  and remain  united. We can maintain a friendly relationship with a woman who does not know our emotions and does not have the same experience, but it is not easy to understand each other.

Pregnancy is a life changing

The most common reasons for losing a friend are our own life changes. Moving, getting married, getting a new job or changing habits are all factors that tend to distance us from friends.

When the friendship is genuine, old routines can resume, but life changes with the arrival of children. And some habits may never be recovered.

Our availability is also changing. We now have other priorities. Responsibilities are also different and interests vary from this new role of mother.

Although everyone has their opinion on the subject, it appears that everyone who comes into our life arrives with a particular purpose. In this regard, it is important to know how to assess each situation in order to also draw positive aspects from it. Looking at the positive side of things is essential during pregnancy  and throughout life.

Mom’s brain changes during pregnancy

Studies have shown that women’s brains undergo changes during pregnancy. Therefore  our personality could change completely.

Soon, things that were important before will take a back seat. Which doesn’t mean we put friendship aside, but maybe we’re more in tune with what’s good for us.

We will now pay more attention to ourselves and the baby. Even if we are invited to go out, we have the right to be demotivated or to have other plans. Things that were essential before won’t be essential, so there is nothing to worry about.

Our friends who are not moms won’t understand us and we don’t need that. Motherhood opens our eyes to the fact that  the only friends that interest us are those who understand us.

Some friends also walk away out of disagreement. The fact that your children are fighting with each other can create situations that are difficult to forgive. In the end, it’s not always the friends who distance themselves from us. During pregnancy, estrangement from friends can come from both sides.